Helping Jennifer

Hello everyone,

I wanted to give everyone an update on Jennifer.

The move has not gone so well. The stress of everything in her life has really put Jennifer in survival mode at best. Her blood pressure is so high that she's having nose bleeds and her hands are tingling. Her doctor is having trouble controlling it.

Progress is being made on the new house and it will someday feel wonderfully homey. For now, though not too many boxes have been unpacked. We were there Sunday, Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Everyone's working diligently, but... She started out very behind. We packed more clothes dirty than clean. You know, life is just overwhelming.

I want to say thanks for the guys that helped. Jennifer has gone on and on about what a blessing it was. I also want to say thanks for those who have prayed. I think we saw one of the times God intervened. The guy from the bank drove by to get the keys from Jennifer. He saw the "moving operation" and felt compassion for her and could not ask her for the keys, so she still has a few more days to get the rest of her stuff out. Oh, yes, did I mention the first house is still not empty... We went there today and after 5 minutes, she had to get out of there and we moved nothing... I would say there's a half days work to get all the final junk out...

I know some people might think, this is Jennifer's problem, her mess and she needs to take care of it herself. We all have problems and we all have a busy life...
And I've put a lot of thought into that. I know it is possible to do too much for someone, enabling them. I guess the Boundaries book describes it as we each have our own little red wagon that we have carry ourselves. But sometimes you get more than your wagon should have in it... That's when Christ says we should help each other... Come along side help carry the burden. Jennifer has more than a normal load. She doesn't need to just figure this out on her own and hop too it. She needs help finding her feet again. She needs to get out from under the burden so she can breath again. So she has a little energy to spare so she can love on her children, have more energy for them. Work on mending her heart so she can the child of God he designed her to be.

I'm sorry, I'm slightly passionate about this. I guess because I've lived it before. When Eric was deployed the first time, I had an infant, we had just moved, my dad and brother almost died that year, and my mom had a broken ankle... I could hardly function. The house was never unpacked. The house was never clean. Jonathan ran around pretty much being the boss of his own self... I was under such a mountain, I couldn't find my way out. I humbled myself to send out an email asking my ABF for help, I even went so far as to list the specific things I needed. moving this, cleaning that, hanging this... I'm not saying no one helped me, but it was not much. By the end of the year, I guess some people were worn out with helping... I think that's where Jennifer's closer friends are now. I slowly, slowly, slowly, pulled my way out. But I'm just certain, help then would have made such a difference in the course of the next year...

So, if anyone is still reading at this point... Here's what I would like to do...

1.) I need a small team, preferably some of my teenage friends to help move the rest of the stuff out of the old house on Sunday.

2.) I plan to go to Jennifer's house on Tuesday nights for the rest of the month of June to help work. I would like for any ladies and/or their children that could help to please come one week. I will go THIS Wednesday 6/11 during the day to help get a big jump start. If you could go I would love the help. Jennifer won't be there, she'll be at work.

3.) Most important, Pray! Pray for Jennifer's health, pray she can find some relaxation to help with the blood pressure issues. Pray for the kids. Jared and David the boys are having the hardest time. And Jennifer just barely has enough energy to survive, much less pour into them and direct them. Kate is the girls name. Pray that Jennifer will find good childcare arrangements for summer. Jared is 12, but he's not responsible enough to be at home alone, much less in charge. This next week Jennifer's mom will watch them, but Jennifer's mom is 90, so that can't be her responsibility.


Thank you all for reading this.

-Cindy